My Grandson’s view of Ellen DeGeneres

My grandson had the opportunity to visit his Great-Grandma over the holidays. He shared with me an experience he found both very disturbing and educational. G-G (as he calls her) told him he would not be able to watch Ellen’s show because she was gay and God didn’t like that. My grandson, who is ten, told his G-G, “I watch this with my Grandma all the time. Ellen is a good person…she’s funny and gives away things to people who really need it.” G-G continued to call Ellen a name in Spanish that meant gay and worthless.

The ten year old told her that it was not nice for her to say that people are bad because they’re gay. He told her that was not right for her to feel like that. He also told her that he didn’t agree with her, yet he proceeded to sit down as they watched another show.

When he came to visit me, he said, “Grandma, I know I made G-G angry with me, but I don’t really care…” and he continued to share the story with me. I asked him if he knew what made a person gay. He said, “It’s people of the same sex who love each other.”

I told him he was a good and courageous person for explaining himself to G-G, even if it made her angry. This ten year old never stops amazing me. His mother is doing a good job raising him.

Have an Unconditionally Loving Meaningful Monday!

Church is supposed to be a safe place.

My daughter shared with me an experience she had over the Christmas holidays. In her attempt to support a family member, she and her son went to church. The sermon that morning was about fighting the sinful feeling that causes people to be gay. My daughter said the pastor shared his experience when he was in the military and how he had to fight off gay advances geared towards him. She said that during the pastor’s ranting about the sins of homosexuality and the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Policy, a young boy entered the church and sat in the back pew, close to where my daughter was seated. The young man sat quietly for about ten minutes and then got up abruptly and walked out the door. She was curious as to why he left, as he was sitting directly in front of her.

When the service was over, she turned to her friend, a member of the church and inquired, “Who was that young man?” She was told that the young man was gay and that his mother was a member of the church and he came to church on that particular day because it was the 1 year anniversary of her death.

To me, that behavior is an abomination to God. I thought that church was a safe place where one can come to connect to God and be in the presence of people who shared the same knowledge and beliefs of the Love of God. What is going on in the churches? What is going on with religion?

Have a Non-Homophobic Meaningful Monday

Press the Rewind Button

When we become parents, we have no clue or idea the amount of sacrifice, hard work and unconditional love we will have to accept and commit to, nor how we will have to dig deep to find the ultimate hope and do a good job.  Over the years, as my children have become parents themselves, I am forced to rewind the button on my life and see where I’ve made mistakes or where I’ve made good choices.  Unconditionally….unknowingly, we teach our children who and what we inherited from our parents.  If we come from a fragmented family, then our teaching tools and skills have a greater chance of being fragmented as well.

In my family, my mother was so busy just trying to keep us fed, safe, and warm.  Some of the individual emotional nurturing was not available some of the time.  As I raised my children, I did the same.  In trying to carve out a life for myself and them, I was busy developing my career, helping my clients and Godchildren, and finding self-love.  My children suffered from a lack of access to my emotions and tenderness, when they sometimes needed it the most.

When I press the rewind button on my life, I would do a whole lot of things differently.  Perhaps, trying to live a life of service to others should always have certain conditions and boundaries.  Perhaps, a sense of urgency to keep my children safe, fed and clothed would not come at such a high price.  Perhaps, following my passion to be an Afrikan scholar, spiritual teacher and healer had given my children a different view on society and the world.

As I press the fast forward button on my life, then…perhaps, all of the above was and is relevant to who my children are, who they are becoming and who I will be.  Today, my children are successful parents, entrepreneurs, healers, and scholars.

To all of you young mothers, fathers, scholars and spiritual healers, please take the time to nurture your children, your mate and your Self.