Over the years, my intention has always been to be diligent, committed and consistent to developing my divinity.  Through this effort, I have found joy, peace and love in and for myself and my family.  When I share the gift and talent that I have received from the universe with people I know and love, it really makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

Over the years, I have shared with many of you via Facebook and email many of my experiences through a blog called Meaningful Mondays.  This blog has now become a published book to guide and assist towards self empowerment and self awareness of mind, body and spirit.  The book has information, scriptures, menus, ceremonies and inspiration that are useful in your daily life. 

I want to thank each one of my blog readers for encouraging me to share, because you all made me see the value in my little stories. 

This is actually my last Meaningful Monday blog.  However, I will be starting a new video blog entitled, “Teaching Tuesdays”, where I will share stories, apataki, and mythology of the archetypical legends of the power source of the Universe known as Orisha that are governing each month’s energy (every month, a different Orisha presides).  I hope you will find this inspiring, useful and beneficial in enhancing your life, and ultimately bringing you joy, peace and love. 

Have a Changing Meaningful Monday

TRANSGENERATIONAL HEALING

This week as I recovered from a stomach virus and coxis related discomfort, I had an opportunity to sit with some of the things I have been experiencing…not physically mind you, but rather what has been VISITING my spirit. I have been experiencing some situations with some of my clients that have drawn my attention to some of the things we face on a daily basis and may not know what, how, when or where they started.

In some of our families, we may see a recurring theme. Some families are distant from each other and are doing fine, some families are close and are there for each other and do just as well. Some families don’t know who their families are and they are ok, and then we have the families that are close and not doing so well (disconnected, sad, suffer with depression) and others may have new families that are a nightmare to them.

In some cases we just go through the motions of what is required when we come together, and in other cases we come to each other’s assistance when it is least expected. Does this make a family not normal? What is a NORMAL family today?

Does a family have to fit into a certain mode, script or definition? I realize through years of counseling sessions and learning how to navigate this life, that some of the pain, sadness, depression, self hate, and self judgment sometimes comes from the energy of some of the dysfunctional pain and hurt endured by our family members living and deceased.

When we experience a recurring feeling of sadness or depression for no apparent reason, I was taught that it could be the “energy” of our cellular memory…just as a person who has lost a limb still feels pain in that limb when it ceases to exist.

Some of the self judgment, sadness, and feelings of disconnection we feel without any apparent reason may be/could be from some painful unresolved event from our Transgenerational experience. (Past family experiences)

In the Yoruba / Ifa/ Lukumi tradition, there are ceremonies to aid and assist in these challenges…for that I give thanks.

So, on this Meaningful Monday as we go into the Full moon let’s open ourselves to receive self acceptance, seeking information, ask permission of our self and lovingly accept that there is always another way of looking and addressing our painful memories.

Have a Self Reflective MEANINGFUL MONDAY

My Grandson’s view of Ellen DeGeneres

My grandson had the opportunity to visit his Great-Grandma over the holidays. He shared with me an experience he found both very disturbing and educational. G-G (as he calls her) told him he would not be able to watch Ellen’s show because she was gay and God didn’t like that. My grandson, who is ten, told his G-G, “I watch this with my Grandma all the time. Ellen is a good person…she’s funny and gives away things to people who really need it.” G-G continued to call Ellen a name in Spanish that meant gay and worthless.

The ten year old told her that it was not nice for her to say that people are bad because they’re gay. He told her that was not right for her to feel like that. He also told her that he didn’t agree with her, yet he proceeded to sit down as they watched another show.

When he came to visit me, he said, “Grandma, I know I made G-G angry with me, but I don’t really care…” and he continued to share the story with me. I asked him if he knew what made a person gay. He said, “It’s people of the same sex who love each other.”

I told him he was a good and courageous person for explaining himself to G-G, even if it made her angry. This ten year old never stops amazing me. His mother is doing a good job raising him.

Have an Unconditionally Loving Meaningful Monday!

Church is supposed to be a safe place.

My daughter shared with me an experience she had over the Christmas holidays. In her attempt to support a family member, she and her son went to church. The sermon that morning was about fighting the sinful feeling that causes people to be gay. My daughter said the pastor shared his experience when he was in the military and how he had to fight off gay advances geared towards him. She said that during the pastor’s ranting about the sins of homosexuality and the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Policy, a young boy entered the church and sat in the back pew, close to where my daughter was seated. The young man sat quietly for about ten minutes and then got up abruptly and walked out the door. She was curious as to why he left, as he was sitting directly in front of her.

When the service was over, she turned to her friend, a member of the church and inquired, “Who was that young man?” She was told that the young man was gay and that his mother was a member of the church and he came to church on that particular day because it was the 1 year anniversary of her death.

To me, that behavior is an abomination to God. I thought that church was a safe place where one can come to connect to God and be in the presence of people who shared the same knowledge and beliefs of the Love of God. What is going on in the churches? What is going on with religion?

Have a Non-Homophobic Meaningful Monday

Press the Rewind Button

When we become parents, we have no clue or idea the amount of sacrifice, hard work and unconditional love we will have to accept and commit to, nor how we will have to dig deep to find the ultimate hope and do a good job.  Over the years, as my children have become parents themselves, I am forced to rewind the button on my life and see where I’ve made mistakes or where I’ve made good choices.  Unconditionally….unknowingly, we teach our children who and what we inherited from our parents.  If we come from a fragmented family, then our teaching tools and skills have a greater chance of being fragmented as well.

In my family, my mother was so busy just trying to keep us fed, safe, and warm.  Some of the individual emotional nurturing was not available some of the time.  As I raised my children, I did the same.  In trying to carve out a life for myself and them, I was busy developing my career, helping my clients and Godchildren, and finding self-love.  My children suffered from a lack of access to my emotions and tenderness, when they sometimes needed it the most.

When I press the rewind button on my life, I would do a whole lot of things differently.  Perhaps, trying to live a life of service to others should always have certain conditions and boundaries.  Perhaps, a sense of urgency to keep my children safe, fed and clothed would not come at such a high price.  Perhaps, following my passion to be an Afrikan scholar, spiritual teacher and healer had given my children a different view on society and the world.

As I press the fast forward button on my life, then…perhaps, all of the above was and is relevant to who my children are, who they are becoming and who I will be.  Today, my children are successful parents, entrepreneurs, healers, and scholars.

To all of you young mothers, fathers, scholars and spiritual healers, please take the time to nurture your children, your mate and your Self.

What do you feel?

What do you feel when you see a couple holding hands, walking, smiling, chatting or even giving and receiving small kisses from each other.  What do you feel when the man and woman in front of you seem to be best friends partners and lovers?  What do you feel when you remember what it was like to be in love…or even “in like”?

Do you feel happy?  Do you smile as you remember the songs you danced to; the precious memories; the little arguments and the making up?  Do you still have the gifts you gave and received?

As you look at the couple, who are by now passionately kissing, you smile as you reminisce about your own joyful love.  Now, what do you feel if this couple was a black man and white woman or  a white man and black woman?

Have a Meaningful Monday

“Homeless”

As I drove down a very popular and busy street, I saw what seemed like a large bundle on the bench at the bus-stop.  As I got closer, I realized that the large bundle was, in fact, a person.  I slowed down, focused my eyes and I saw the face of a woman.  “Is she waiting for the bus?” I thought.  “Was she safe there lying down on the bench?” My mind was racing, the questions kept coming.  I wondered if she had chosen this location because it was highly visible and she would be safe.  By then, my heart was sinking.

As I drove in silence, I connected to the woman.  How had she gotten there in life?  I wondered if she was someone’s sister, mother, aunt…but I knew she was someone’s daughter.  I wondered if her family knew where she was and if they were looking for her.

My heart began to race and I started feeling panicky.  I started thinking of how many people are in the same position of this poor woman.  Perhaps she has mental health issues.  Perhaps she just gave up on life as we know it.

When I see the thousands of empty buildings all over my city whose owners fell on hard times because of the challenging economy, I wonder how someone in government, business, or who is financially secure can see the need to do something about this homelessness.  Perhaps, they can fix the buildings and allow the homeless to move in to occupy and maintain it.

It seems to me, in time, this could become a way of giving back, resolving the homeless crises and rebuild our economy slowly.  Any of us reading this can become homeless, including myself.  I am still trying to figure out what I can and should do to help.

Have a Thoughtful and Meaningful Monday.

Go Figure!

I’m trying to figure out what was in a father’s mind as he walked from the mall with two young ladies.  One was about nine years old, the other about thirteen.  At first, I was trying to figure out if the girls were his daughters.  They were walking and chatting away as they were coming out of the mall, packages in hand, smiling and laughing because they had completed some of their holiday shopping.

As I watched, my mouth flew open so wide that I coughed as the chilly air filled my mouth and throat.  The thirteen year old kept saying, “Dad this…Dad that…”, while the younger one continued to eat her ice cream cone.  My mind was racing.  What on Earth was on that father’s mind when he left home?  What was he thinking?  Where was her mother?  What are the dynamics of her relationship with her Dad?  These were some of the questions I asked myself.  Why would he feel comfortable, at ease, and fatherly?   As I continued to look at her, I realized I was not alone.  There were other passers-by who were looking with embarrassment at the three people in front of us.

As I left the parking lot, my mind was racing again.  I was asking myself in my mind (or maybe I was actually talking to myself out loud), what is happening to our society?  What are we teaching our children as parents?  Parents are expected to assist guide and expose our children to values, morals and good character.  I am concerned, if not worried about where we will be as a society in about twenty years from now.

I must share my sadness and disappointment with you.  Perhaps you can help me recover from the shock.  Seeing a father walking with his thirteen year old daughter and she has on a pair of pants with all of her pubic area exposed.  She had on a pair of skinny jeans and her entire navel, stomach and pubic bone was showing.  I need your help to figure this one out.  I’m having a sad Meaningful Monday.

Meaningful Monday December 20th, 2010

During the month of December in most cultures, religions, and practices there are celebrations around LIGHTS.  This is the season for celebration, love, thanks-giving and feasting.  The true meaning of Christmas, Babaluaiye, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and Solstice celebration is all about the coming into realization that through determination, courage, forgiveness, kindness, self awareness, and unconditional love we can transcend our negative emotions and allow our spirits to find EN-LIGHT-ENMENT.

When we are enlightened we act with the awareness that everything and everyone that comes into our lives brings an opportunity for us to choose the higher meaning, the inner meaning, the true meaning of love and the light.  To love, forgive, or accept negative experiences as they happen is truly a gift from God.  To be angry, get upset, and even pissed off is also a blessing when we are in the moment of the confusion once we recognize that we can choose to go right back to the forgiveness, love, and self acceptance.

As we light our lights on our Christmas trees, Alters,Shrines, Kinara, or Menorah…let’s really light the LIGHT of enlightenment, love, and acceptance of each other.  Let’s pray to be instruments of love and examples of God’s mercy.  Let’s search our hearts and respond with love, peace, and forgiveness.  Let’s try to receive our blessings with humility and gratitude, so we can make a new world.

Have an Enlightening Meaningful Monday !